Scandinavia Rules The Sound Waves

[vps]

Thanks Urpal! Seems to be sunny & warm for a change as well, so I'm looking forward to good time relaxing in the hammock!

[Urpal]

You might take a transistor radio turned down low (not to disturb the gulls or drown them out, you understand) to keep in touch with the Live8 happenings on the off chance that something special transpires rather than the "history repeated as farce" Marxist groove thang that might be predicted.

[glee]

Live8 here is only on pay tv, Foxtel. So I won't be watching.

[Urpal]

That's outrageous. Presumably that's a Murdoch owned TV channel as well is it? No question about who "rules the sound waves " then.

the coverage is on about 3 BBC TV channels and several radio stations here, all of which are free to air.

You should be able to listen  and possibly watch some stuff online through various BBC channels:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/music/thelive8event/

http://www.bbc.co.uk/music/thelive8event/onbbc/

[Adam]

Back to the title theme for a mo - there's a song on the excellent new Dirtbombs compilation called 'They hate us in Scandinavia'.  Sleeve notes put it down to a poor review in a 'garage magazine' in Norway.  Did anyone see it?  It seems to have rankled.

Other great song titles on this record include:

'I'm in love with Nichelle Nichols (No.3)'
'Never licking you again'
'Broke in Detroit (again)'
'Insecure, me?'
and
'Little Miss chocolate syrup'.

I love a good title.

[Cassiel]

I love a good title.

Me too. Favourites include:

'I Caught My Heel in the Crack of Time' (Dave Graney)
'Screwed Over by Stylish Introverts' (Loud Family)

A good use of parentheses helps: Try and Leave if you can (I bet you can't do it) by Bessie Banks for example.


And of course country music is a great source:

I Changed Her Oil, She Changed my Life
She's Actin' Single, I'm Drinkin' Doubles 
Drop Kick Me Jesus Through the Goal Posts of Life
Her Teeth Was (sic) Stained, But Her Heart Was Pure
Get Your Tongue Out'a My Mouth Cause I'm Kissin' You Goodbye
Mama Get A Hammer (There's A Fly On Papa's Head)

and the legendary...
Wouldn't Take Her To A Dog Fight, Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win

[Adam]

This probably deserves a new thread somewhere. 

[glee]

Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life
End over end neither left nor to right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life.

Make me, oh make me, Lord more than I am
Make me a piece in your master game plan
Free from the earthly tempestion below
I’ve got the will, Lord if you’ve got the toe.

Take all the brothers who’ve gone on before
And all of the sisters who’ve knocked on your door
All the departed dear loved ones of mine
Stick’em up front in the offensive line.

Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life
End over end neither left nor to right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life.

[Adam]

And there's a song on the new Silver Jews record called "How Can I Love You (If You Won't Lie Down?)"

[Cassiel]

Seein' as we're on a Kinky Friedman tip here, how about:

Get your biscuits in the oven (and your buns in the bed)

Second best bakery metaphor in music history, behind Macarthur's Park. But without doubt the most un-PC lyric ever. (possibly behind 'They Don't make Jews like Jesus anymore', another of Kinky's greats).

You uppity women I don't understand
Why you gotta go and try to act like a man,
But before you make your weekly visit to the shrink
You'd better occupy the kitchen, liberate the sink.

Get your biscuits in the oven and your buns in the bed
That's what I to my baby said,
Women's liberation is a-going to your head,
Get your biscuits in the oven and your buns in the bed.

Early every morning you're out on the street
Passing out pamphlets to everyone you meet.
You gave up your Maiden Form for Lent
And now the front of your dress has an air scoop vent.

Every single brakeman that's ever come along
Had a little woman always tellin' him that he's wrong.
Eve said to Adam, "Here's an apple you horse"
And Delilah defoliated Samson's moss.

Get your biscuits in the oven and your buns in the bed
That's what I to my baby said,
Women's liberation is a-going to your head,
Get your biscuits in the oven and your buns in the bed.

Mean-hearted harpies are breaking all the laws
Tearing up their girdles and a-burning up their bras,
Now the air is dirty and the sex is clean
And your coffee makes my hair turn green.

So damn emancipated in your mind and your body,
Gonna have to cancel all your lessons in karate.
If you can't love a male chauvinist
You'd better cross me off your shopping list.

Get your biscuits in the oven and your buns in the bed
That's what I to my baby said,
Women's liberation is a-going to your head,
Get your biscuits in the oven and your buns in the bed.

Mrs Cassiel has just read this over my shoulder and has muttered something about a rolling pin 

[Urpal]

Is Mrs Cassiel planning on rolling out some dough and baking you something tasty then, Mr Cassiel?

A hot cross bun perhaps?

[Cassiel]

Cassiel en Croute is a favourite, Urpal, is true. But she's a big fan of Kinky's books, which I can recommend even though they all got a bit samey after a while. Read somewhere that the Kinkster is standing for Governor of Texas. Given the above lyrics, not sure he can count on the feminist vote. 

[Urpal]

If Dallas is anything to go by feminism isn't a major concern amongst the Texan population - those Texan gals seemed more concerned finding shade under the rim of JR's ten galloner. Mind you, someone got wise to his wicked, scheming and callous ways in the end. Can't remember who, but no doubt there's a website out there with the complete script and a few shots of Hagman frowns, Hagman grins, Sue Ellen sobs uncontrollable and bitter alcohol drenched tears etc.

[Cassiel]

Who shot J.R? Now there's a can of worms we don't wanna open...(Christine was it? a dark-haired woman, evil in her murderin', cheatin' heart?)

But Kinky's platform is here:

http://www.kinkyfriedman.com/

The election mobile looks promising...

[vps]

Of course Larry Hagman is of Scandinavian origin, otherwise this string would seem to have gone astray  . Still waiting for Norway to contribute, seeing as geographically speaking, only Norway and Sweden belong to Scandinavia. To be pedantic but educational  it's the Nordic countries that comprise of Denmark, Finland, Iceland, Norway, and Sweden as well as Faroe islands, etc. Sorry about that.  I feel ashamed already.